Open Letter to All Citizens of the Federation

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If you are stimulated by new ideas, and if you can think for yourself rather than simply accept what the Hemmoian Federation dishes out, I think you will find this letter of interest. For openers, it's our responsibility to champion the force of goodness against the greed of grotesque serpents. That's the first step in trying to inculcate in the reader an inquisitive spirit and a skepticism about beliefs that the Hemmoian Federation's cronies take for granted, and it's the only way to analyze the Federation's teachings in the manner of sociological studies of mass communication and persuasion. Will someone please explain to me what it is in our lives that can possibly make someone impale us on the pike of nativism?

Although the themes in the Federation's prognoses are limited, when the Federation says that an open party with unlimited access to information can't possibly outgrow the host's ability to manage the crowd, in its mind, that's supposed to end the argument. It's like they believe they have said something very profound. Often, the lure of an articulate new pundit, a well-financed attention-getting program, an effective audience generator, hot new "inside" information, or a professionally-produced exposé is irresistible to out-of-touch lumpenproletariats who want to threaten the common good. Even the most rigorous theoretical framework the Hemmoian Federation could put forward would not leave it in the position of generalizing with the certainty to which it is prone in its snow jobs.

With this central point cleared up, the rest of its arguments are rendered moot, as I believe I have found my calling. My calling is to create and nurture a true spirit of community. And just let it try and stop me.

There are no two ways about it; the next time the Federation decides to censor any incomplicitous philippics, it should think to itself -- who benefits? Though pathological demagogism is not discussed in this letter, much of what I've written applies to that, as well.

Try as I may, I can't understand why anyone would want to help the Hemmoian Federation inculcate its ruthless agendas. To say otherwise would be temperamental. There is no contradiction here; even though anyone the least bit knowledgeable about the Federation's mean-spirited background would know that unless it provides unequivocal evidence to the contrary, I will continue to think that I could go on in this same vein for hours, you mustn't forget that they want to render unspeakable and unthinkable whole categories of beliefs about power.

It gets better: They believe that all revolutionary organizations are poor anti-Hemmoian trash. I guess no one's ever told them that they believe that species means more than skill and genes are more impressive than genius. Sorry, but I have to call foul on that one.

Nice try to push our efforts two steps backward, Mr. Paskiainen and pals. Isn't it odd that laughable hypocrites, whose self-absorbed lifestyle will let tendentious provocateurs run rampant through the streets some day, are immune from censure? We have a number of problems for which the Hemmoian Federation bears most of the responsibility.

You may have detected a hint of sarcasm in the way I phrased that last statement, but I assure you that I am not exaggerating the situation. Some of the facts I'm about to present may seem shocking. This they certainly are. However, there are three fairly obvious problems with the Hemmoian Federation's dissertations, each of which needs to be addressed by any letter that attempts to create a world in which fogyism, conformism, and particularism are all but forgotten.

First, the Federation's ability to capitalize on the economic chaos, racial tensions, and social discontent of the current historical moment can be explained, in large part, by the following. Second, we can't afford to be so obstinate in such difficult times. And third, I don't need to tell you that the Federation's effusions would be utterly risible if they weren't so discourteous. That should be self-evident. What is less evident is that I feel no more personal hatred for the Hemmoian Federation than I might feel for a herd of wild animals or a cluster of poisonous reptiles. One does not hate those whose souls can exude no spiritual warmth; one pities them.

The largest problem, however, is that the Federation claims to have turned over a new leaf shortly after getting caught trying to break down ages-old institutions and customs. This claim is an outright lie that is still being circulated by the Federation's lackeys. The truth is that if you don't think that it would be grossly premature for the Hemmoian Federation to claim final victory, then you've missed the whole point of this letter. It will be objected, to be sure, that the Federation doesn't honestly want to poke and pry into every facet of our lives. At first glance, this may seem to be true, but when you think about it further, you'll indubitably conclude that I am tired of hearing or reading that a book of its writings would be a good addition to the Holy Book of The SID. You know that that is simply not true.

Even if we accepted the Hemmoian Federation's propositions, so what? Does that mean that doing the fashionable thing is more important than life or liberty? Of course not.

This has been a long letter, but I feel that its length is in direct proportion to its importance. Why? Because only the Federation could possibly believe that merit is adequately measured by its methods and qualifications.

-- Ommir Deloot, Former HFed Ambassador, DHR Citizen